Funny rules for dating my daughter
I’ve also organized our treatment of this topic into three parts: your (daughter) emotional need for your father, what you should learn from your father, and what parts of your father’s personality you might identify with.Just as with a son, a daughter needs to experience the presence and love of a stable father growing up.Identifying with an unavailable father can occur in the form of picking unavailable lovers, or turning oneself into an unavailable lover or both.The point is unavailability or absence becomes part of the daughter’s love life.The fact is, these ‘childhood/adolescent needs for love do not belong in her adult love relationship. An adult lover cannot give the love a father was supposed to give.
In many instances, these efforts to procure the love that was lost lead instead to disappointment, low self-esteem, and further feelings of loss.
Frustrated love will not ignore the person who frustrates.
Frustrated love seeks a way to have that person psychologically if not physically.
The state of ‘absence’ I am talking about includes both physical and emotional unavailability.
This post focuses on what a woman might experience with a father who is unavailable and how it might influence her adult love life.When these lessons were not provided by either her father or her mother as a backup a woman’s love life “standards” can be lower because of unresolved feelings of loss creating lower levels of self-esteem.When a woman’s self-esteem is low she is subject to greater mistreatment and abuse because her need for a lost father’s love is too compelling resulting in less discrimination in her love life.This post is about the possible effects of an emotionally absent father on a daughter’s adult love life.